Professionals who do school readiness tests often comment on the quiet and unshakable confidence that our Practica children have when they are faced with the typical challenges that unnerve other children of the same age. This is remarkable, especially since there are so many other really talented children who are lacking in confidence. In fact, many clever children become afraid of failure over time and as a result they tend to avoid challenges instead of “laughing in the face of danger”.
The good news is that the Practica Program provides parents with thousands of little learning opportunities that are so easily interwoven into a daily routine, allowing parents and children to play together more often than they would otherwise have done. One activity leads to the next, and the activities become progressively more challenging. This teaches Practica children that trying, failing and trying again is part of learning and getting ahead. Being confident has a lot more to do with failing and learning to be patient with yourself than most parents think.
I guess this is why I just loved the following quote when a good friend shared it with me last week. I searched, but although she said she had read it online, I cannot find the original source. It reads as follows:
Patience with family is LOVE
Patience with others is RESPECT
Patience with yourself is CONFIDENCE.
The more I think about these words, the more I am impacted by how true they are. As I think back over the time that I had with my children when they were little, I realize that it was definitely during the times when I expected too much of myself that I was also most impatient and my confidence levels reached an all-time low.
What makes me sad is that those were also often the times when I was most impatient with my children, and it was the most difficult time for me to let them feel my love for them. Also, as I count back the years and link different incidences and experiences, I realize that it was during those exact times that my husband didn't feel loved and respected.
I don't know if this is true for everyone, but in my case, the biggest lesson that I learn from these wise words is that expecting too much from myself won't impress the people that I love. It doesn't make them love me more or somehow make me more "worthy" of their respect. It simply deprives them of the love and respect that I would otherwise be able to give to them.
Written by Lizette van Huyssteen
When we know better... we do better